Because dick.

Jesus fucking Christ.

This would be funnier if he looked like he wasn't having a good time.

I am a physician and have seen horrific spinal injuries to regional high school players since I work at a tertiary referral center. Quadriplegia/death are the rule, not the exception.

Probably best that we just nod in silent agreement on this one buddy.

This is bathroom socialism. Removing urinals and ballooning the average waiting time for the men’s restroom while slightly lowering the women’s.

This is a joke right?

Goddamn his daughters have grown so much since he was elected...and he looks so old!

This is sickening. I hope I get to see Snyder in handcuffs.

I am jealous of his pretty face and therefore this story pleases me.

This must be why Sampras owned Agassi’s ass.

Can anyone provide evidence that mosquitos do anything useful other than spread horrible diseases and at the least annoy everyone?

Good.

“What’s Aaron taste like?” — Olivia Munn

I have no earthly idea how Sanders thinks he could get congress to pass a single payer bill. Would he be an angry president who got nothing done but would be entertaining? That would be distinct from Clinton, who would probably get plenty done that would potentially be actively harmful.

It’s funny ‘cause no one in LA gives a shit.

Well maybe they could expand the 405 to twenty lanes!

Hugging my kids for a little longer tonight.

Damn.

As someone who idolized Griffey growing up, I cannot believe he is in the hall. I am so fucking old.