President Obama put it best:

Trump could be 100% certain he’s not going to pardon Arpario right up to the moment he steps on stage in Phoenix.

There, FTFY.

Let’s play Guess Who Said the Stupid Thing! “I’m someone who believes in more monuments, not less monuments.”

Wouldn’t have been scarier to showcase an actual, you know, cult? Like a Jonestown-Hale Bop-Waco-Manson family-Moonie-Scientology-Martha May Marcy Marlene cult? Why take artistic license with the word when its literal use would have provided a far greater wealth of inspiration? Why is Ryan Murphy so bad at this and…

I gave up after the Carnival season.

The screaming may have been melodramatic, but can anyone here say that their internal monologue didn’t sound exactly like that when Trump won? I had a goddamn panic attack in my kitchen. And I don’t mind that Evan Peters apparently plays a maniacal psycho who celebrates Trump’s victory because I do think that’s…

It is confusing, chaotic, and loud bordering on shrill. I wanted it to stop after the first ten seconds. All precisely like this presidency.

Honestly, this looks like a spoof that Funny or Die would do on AHS. As excited as I am to see Alison Pill working again, it just all looks ridiculous and like, joyless silliness. SMDH.

My fan theory is that she faked her own death to escape a suffocating marriage.

I’m a Donna truther.

Seriously, a crying selfie?

“ …advisers say the triggers for his temper are” … “if he’s caught by surprise…”

omg I legit cackled at this... twice

What sorts of things make Trump angry? Only the sorts of things that, as president, he unfailingly faces daily:

White House officials and informal advisers say the triggers for his temper are if he thinks someone is lying to him, if he’s caught by surprise, if someone criticizes him, or if someone stops him from trying to do something or seeks to control him.

I tried to tell this to my eternally angry father (who basically thinks every Republican should be inprisoned or be set on fire), but he doesn’t quite believe me. He thinks that Trump has someone in his administration taking polls and finding out that people want him to say all his insane shit and he only does this…

Of course 45 is triggered by criticism; he’s such a fucking narcissist that he thinks he’s always in the right. And his fuckboy fans eat it up. It drives me nuts how they twist themselves to defend the shit he does. I don’t think they will ever turn on him.

Dear KFC: Please provide this motherfucker with a constant supply of gravy and extra-crispy. Clearly, the only way this creature can be stopped is with a heart attack or stroke since the people who are supposed to take care of this are too busy pulling a Chip Diller.

There is no bottom. There is. No bottom.

If you have friends or family in Arizona, ask them to go to this link, register for free tickets for 45's Tuesday rally in Phoenix, and then don’t show up IN DROVES. I am 99% sure that 45 is gonna pardon Joe Arpaio at this rally. There’s a rumor going around that the IP addresses are being gathered of those who…