Oh, gods, this looks so awful. So wonderfully, appropriately awful!

Uh-oh—looks like some Ancient Race’s data backup facility reactor’s getting wonky!

This looks rather good, actually. Though, as a shadow person myself, I find it a bit laughable—we’d never think to actually harm one of our “ink farms”; that would be like killing the cow whose milk you live on!—I do like the fact that the film addresses the phenomenon in the form of “the hag,” one of the oldest and…

I liked it much better when it was called Paranormal Witness on SyFy and was actually good. (Terribly dumb, but entertaining.)

This literally sounds like the most boring film imaginable. Why don’t they just call it Float Around for 12 Months? The sequel, then, could be titled Gravity Sucks Ass.

This looks like unbearable schmaltzy holiday melodrama at its absolute worst...but with that cast, hell, I’m going to see it anyway!

That was dumb as shit...but, to be truthful, I’m so damn oblivious to everything that I could very well just stumble through the Batpocalypse half-awake if it wouldn’t be for all my friends texting and messaging me to come out and enjoy the fun.

Oh, hell, I’ve always known it was Childs!

I’ll bet they find tardigrades all over that damn rock.

I’ve never really watched the animated series, but I’m down with anything Thrawn-related. Chiss 4 Lyfe, yo.

SO MANY DICKS. Since I’m prettymuch Jonah Hill’s character in Superbad—strangely obsessed with phalli—I heartily approve the inclusion of more raging boners in film...even if they are digital.

Ohyes. Right to the top of my Must-See list!

Chuck Tingle is a literary genius. I own every single one of the man’s works. Seriously. Some of the best laughs I’ve ever had!

This will be completely hilarious!

I liked it just fine. It’s a comic-book movie. <shrug> I don’t know what people were expecting, but I can understand why such a thing won’t be everyone’s cup of tea. Even though it wasn’t hacked to ribbons like the theatrical release of Batman vs. Superman—the director’s cut of which was really good—I could tell there…

I’m still holding out for Kingdoms of The Deep or whatever the hell they’re calling it now.

Most Americans also believe that our country is special because of the divine providence extended to it by some moldy old Levantine god. I couldn’t give a rat’s ass what most Americans think. Let them lie around all day in drink, petting their guns and watching midget porn on the internet: my cyborged ass is gonna be…

You can find it on The Pirate Bay and elsewhere in the torrentverse. It’s actually quite good, although it’s quite predictable. Still, the film features some solid performances, handles its material with some actual sensitivity, and actually dares to not offer up a stock, Poltergeist-y “now everyone’s a family again…

Read Bret Easton Ellis’ Glamorama. Then it will make sense!

As far as I’m concerned, the game was Ghostbusters 3. I friggin’ LOVED it! Hell, I just finished playing through it again a few weeks ago!