This video is Shear Bliss!

Poop in front of someone? Naw, I ain't down with that. I consider poop-time to be me-time.

I just threw up in my granny purse a little. Yuck.

Uh. NO!

Sorry. I'm busy knitting g-strings for walruses.

I get sick of these Pink Pimps. If Corporate Pimps want to donate, just give a cash donation and get on with it. This is not altruism, it's sales.

Not. Enough. Pus.

It's sad and pathetic. But $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$.

Kanye isn't stupid. He just overestimates his importance. The Ego that Can Not be Quenched.

Get a job, ya bum!

Back in the day, when my kid was of school age, I CHOSE a christian school because I live in Detroit. Notorious for bad schools. I paid a heavy tuition and was not happy with the religious study which seemed as important to them as reading. When a charter school opened up, I moved her. It was good to get out of that…

I get "you have a nice face". Code for 'the rest of you is ugly as hell'. Fat girls Unite!

Just when I think I can't hate this human ego machine more, he does something even more obnoxious! He even thinks being raped by a girl made him a good sex partner. Wow.

I make my daughter watch 'Bridezillas'. I told her the first hint of a bridezilla from her and I will SHUT HER DOWN. No spoiled babies will be getting married on my watch.

Texas, why you so stupid, stupids???

Remember, while you're a fetus, they feign concern. Once you are born, you starve them to punish Mama.

"WHY??????"

I buy magazines with beautiful Food Porn images. Impossibly difficult decorated cakes. Glistening plates of Bar-B-Q. Luscious pasta dishes. Chocolate covered, sugar-sweetened cupcakes. I'm an easy sell.

She seems like one of those bubbly little Sorority Girls who breeze through the day without a thought in her little head. What a silly girl. Let me get you some coffee, dear...