I wish he’d have considered alternating comments. That’s where the really effective power lies.

I’m pretty sure no one is a believer at this point. Or an all-star.

He probably named his dog “Dorian”.

Body glide is a miracle from the gods. I never knew my butt cheeks could chafe. And thanks to Body glide, they never will again.

Thank god he’s not a serial killer. If the way he serves is any indication, no one would know where the bodies are. Or even know a crime was committed.

When WILL us plebeians learn our proper place? I’m so rusty at genuflecting it’s almost embarrassing.

This is the pink slime of sporting beef. Or if you’re trying to sell it, a lean finely textured beef.

The truth hurts. Today was a train wreck you knew was coming and could do nothing about aside from see if someone could jump off at the last second, maybe only shattering a femur.

I just assumed this was the natural state of existence for any human currently tied in any way to the Lakers.

The only thing the Nats bullpen does reliably is be unreliable. Even that they occasionally fuck up.

They’re destined for at least several more weeks of togetherness until the temptation of US Open winner quality road beef becomes too tempting for him.

Next thing he’ll be telling us the key to winning is to score more than your opponent.

Not for the Preds.

Thanks for using the phrase “etymological fallacy” to confirm you have no fucking idea what you’re talking about. If you’re going to use big words, maybe have adult supervision to make sure you don’t hurt yourself. Or come across like a moron with a thesaurus.

They are actually. Words have definitions for a reason. And you don’t get to arbitrarily redefine them to suit your inane argument.

Your first mistake is driving through Reston. Your second is conflating Reston with Fairfax County. Generally, totalitarian governments don’t ask you if you want to raise taxes and then go “Well, OK.” when you say no.

Exactly. Bunch of fucking fascists. What with all those stupid “elections” and “referendums”.

You’d think electing Trump would be the pinnacle of this demonstration of gleeful ignorance at juuussst about everything. And yet I still find myself amazed, months after that God-awful day, just how willfully and pridefully ignorant Americans can be.

And his coffee.

Give me 10 minutes and a Macedonian IP address...