Jason Whitlock is leaving the Kansas City Star.

Dicks were actually thrown at Tila Tequila, but none belonged to Shaggy.

Then he said it again: "negro leg."

Couldn't have come at a worse time. His Value Over Replacement Trashy Southern Drawl had been skyrocketing over the past couple seasons.

@Delonte, Interrupted: ...it being Music Week and all.

So the Herald commissioned...Chris Robinson to draw the key moments from Saturday's season opener

@Phintastic: +1

When Intentional Walks Go Horribly, Horribly Wrong

"Wait, do body shots count as 'trick shots?'"

Continuing with this month's Spike Jonze video reenactment theme, Jazz Hands Sunday will see Christopher Walken jump over the batting cage and mug creepily for the jumbotron.

@sukkerpunch: No, I thought that was Clarence Thomas back in the day.

An historic season for the Giants really, considering that teammate Pablo Sandoval is currently leading the league in floaters.

@vodkanaut: Don't block this man's shine, shawty. Congrats!

Somewhere, an attorney is ardently researching a pioneering new defense that his client is "just a juggalo," and cannot be held responsible for his actions.

There ya go. Fixed your sport for you.

@MarkKelsosMigraine: Yeah, already wishing I had access to the edit button so many others seem to use. I think I found "too far."

@Eddie Murray Sparkles: +1, 2 on a good night.

Dude! Gnarly! Radical! Tubular! Bodacious!

she likes to be punched in the kidneys while having rough anal sex

Rick Reilly is afraid these reports may be massaging the truth a bit.