Thank you for posting this. I have done the same thing, laughing and smiling while all of my professional experience and purpose is reduced to my body and its availability to prop up some man’s ego. The posturing of it. The laughing it off. Small and sickening. For another bubble bursting, check out this essay about…

I don’t think you are a POS. That’s vulgar and mean. You are ignorant, or you commented as though you are.

I am so glad you made this comment. I thought the same thing. Therapy may help, or if LW can afford it, finding the right life coach might work even better. It’s a tricky thing, learning how to become an adult who is different from a toxic parent. The key is to focus on becoming the sort of man (or woman) or…

I wish I knew more about the law. It seems like it might be worthwhile finding an attorney with a strong track record with respect to sexual assault and just explain what you want—not to prosecute or sue, but to formally report what happened. There must be some legal mechanism for doing this. I wish you the very best.

As one grey to another, yes to all of this. And thank you.

I remember learning about a website that would allow people to anonymously post a warning to someone that they might have been exposed to a sexually transmitted infection. The website would send a generic notice to the e-mail addresses provided, and let people know they should go be tested for the diseases checked…

Jia Tolentino wrote a brilliant article in the New Yorker this week about “How men like Harvey Weinstein implicate their victims in their acts.” The last three paragraphs break down the complicated emotional and psychological fallout from sexual assault and sexual harassment. One of the points she makes is that when…

“without fear of retribution. “ 

I remember spending my late teens and early twenties walking around through the streets and El-train stations in Chicago or after dark on campus in Bloomington, Indiana and I wished, try it. Please. Try it. I need a reason to let this out.

Yes. Fuck that guy, and let’s banish the notion that anything could ever be wrong with the girl who was preyed upon like that. I say this because thoughts are one thing, and the feelings that come up are another. And I’m glad you said it now. Fuck that guy and his small, desperate, destructive mind.

Ugh. Yes. Those “first times” and the feeling of needing to be good, to be polite, to have good manners, while my soul is dying. I wish that decades ago when I was still little, I had learned about loving and protecting my humanity FIRST and how to be polite second. Well. Never too late.

Look, your insecurity and fear are your feelings. Everyone has a right to their feelings. Your behavior is a different matter and that is what sexual harassment is, behavior. Not thoughts or feelings. Feel however you want to. Think however you want to think. But if you behave in ways that undermine the success of…

Yech. Poor plant.

Oh gosh! Your mom is not talking about beauty. She is talking about glamour or status and neither can hold a candle to the brilliance of true beauty. We are ALL endowed with beauty that can only radiate from within and changes (but never fades) with age. I feel sad for women who do not trust or even know their inner…

Yes this dynamic you describe is what I see as well. And to be honest, despite my feminist values, I have succumbed to the dynamic in most of my relationships with men. This is what I see as the real challenge for hetero relationships. How do men and women who desire each other learn to be in relationship with each…

I am loving these insights/comments. They remind me of passages from The Golden Notebook. I wish I could find the exact words, but the point being made had to do with straight men in particular and how sad it must be for them, because so many seem to believe that they are only valuable or desirable to women who need…

You are speaking my truth!! A thousand stars.

I wonder how many people who say they voted for Obama and then voted for Trump are lying about the first part? I know there was some flipping that happened. But...There is that phenomenon of white people saying they vote for a Black candidate and then pulling a different lever so to speak when they actually vote.…

You are doing the right thing. I was in an emotionally abusive relationship for 14 years and coming to terms with what I had been through took a long time. I didn’t realize how bad it had been until after he left. I had to work a long time to forgive myself for not seeing the abuse. I DO forgive him. He was messed up…

Love this costume!!!! I just tried to click for recommending and it kept deducting stars so I want you to know I think you should have 100!