Only because he would have bribed her to believe that

You’re right about that.

Not even $10M worth of Detrol can stop them now!

Sad, Blatter, the leaks have started.

I wouldn’t call the smell ‘tart’, but asparagus definitely alters the odor of my leeks.

At that point I would perceive it as a threat, so yes, I would take it more seriously.

Since when did she get male counterparts? Don’t tell me she swapped with Bruce Jenner...

The main thing that gripes my ass whenever someone does a profile of Solo is the way that her behavior, whether overtly or not, is somehow explained away or justified by her tough childhood.

He meant the Mama’s and the Papa’s, but his spellchecker was born too late.

Threesomes don’t sound very safe, either.

I’ve seen the leaked fappening pics. Believe me, the gaping holes in her story are the least of her worries

The fact that 5 separate people have deemed this a comment worth starring removes what little faith I have in humanity.

What if you see it shoot a tennis ball 50 feet and hit a small target, dumping a politician into a pit filled with chicken shit?

If only... More like “Abandon Chastity....”

They all have staffers who interned with Blatter or Goodell. (Only The Onion has one that interned with Jack Warner.)

Heres hoping you are never solo with her because she seems like a monster.

finally a dangerous, violent, high profile female athlete is treated with the nonchalance and indifference by her league and the police as her male counterparts.

Sign over door at USWNT practice facility: “ Abandon Hope all ye who enter here...”

I keep forgetting that Hope Solo isn’t an upcoming Star Wars character.

Most damning, however, is this: