Jab them in the eye. That’s what you do with a shark, or any other predator. Go for the sensitive, soft bits and hope you can get away. Common sense.

Cat ear key chain thing? Do tell! After weird approaches by creepy dudes on the rare occasions I have been out after dark in the city, I’m thinking about carrying the camping bear spray. No aim involved, but it will hit everyone , including me. A creepy guy came up to a friend and I recently when we were on the…

Almost the least she could've done. Almost.

Just wait until you see the whole thing:

the other kind of dick in a box....

I just don’t see how you could possibly provide this service. A breakup box should consist of gin, old photographs, any remaining items of his in your home, and scissors. I don’t need you to send me what I definitely already have in my possession.

Every time I read a story about xoJane, I wonder if it’s a big con set up by MRA types to make women look terrible... but I suspect it’s actually a big con set up by corporations to sell products like breakup boxes.

DB Cooper IS an FBI Agent! That’s why they never caught him!

I want a therapy Ewok. I want to cuddle an Ewok until I have a stroke form the cuteness, and die.

Well, they’re better therapists than Hannibal Lecter.

“The dining room can be a land mine. Sometimes, one member of a couple will get jealous when the other pays attention to someone else. Other couples become too amorous, prompting calls to “keep it in your room.”

I will add this place to my shortlist. If my husband goes first, I fully intend to bang all the dudes in the nursing home. Gotta pass the time somehow. I was never very good at knitting and such.

I have a friend who works at an assisted living and she told me that STDs and UTIs run rampant and that Viagra use is common. And the male to female ration makes for a lot of romantic rivalries for the men’s affection.

My generation did not invent the fuckboy

this is still one of my favourite images on the internet and never fails to make me laugh

Still won’t eat his veggies.

I love him. All the apathy. He like lays down in the middle of the paths of people in the middle of public walkways. He truly rules Downing Street.

Not the right animal either. You’re on the wrong hoof entirely.

A government spokesperson told the BBC that, in fact, “It’s a civil servant’s cat and does not belong to the Camerons - he will be staying.”