Everytime this site mentions the kardashians I'm going to drink a little bottle of whiskey.

I love that Hillary is fucking up her own campaign and all this website can do is point the finger at Bernie Sanders supporters.

These people need to be reparented. I don't know what could happen to a person in their childhood to make them so hateful, but I think corporal punishment is in order here.

MANUFACTURED DRAMA. Why can’t we have REAL fights? Like, I want to see Taylor drive her new Maserati down the street into Kim’s house. I want her to show up on a Kimye Sex Tape with a flare gun. I WANT HER BOAT TO CRASH INTO KIM’S BOAT AND THEM HAVE A MURDOCH-TURNER STYLE BEEF. I WANT IT ALL.

MANUFACTURED DRAMA. Why can’t we have REAL fights? Like, I want to see Taylor drive her new Maserati down the street into Kim's house. I want her to show up on a Kimye Sex Tape with a flare gun. I WANT HER BOAT TO CRASH INTO KIM'S BOAT AND THEM HAVE A MURDOCH-TURNER STYLE BEEF. I WANT IT ALL.

Well, at least Taylor wasn't caught with Ray J. Or exposed for a fake marriage to a man who I'm sure was just cloned by the E! network.

I'm a fan of T but also admire K for her ability to NEVER LET HER UNDESERVED FAME DIE. In the collapse of society and end of the world as we know that is predicted for this November, all that will be left will be cockroaches and Kim on instagram.

One part of me says that manufactured, Kardashian drama with no actual fights are very dull, and a way to distract us from real problems. Another part of me is Team Tay Tay, who is so immensely talented in so many genres, and the only thing Kim is good at is taking pictures of herself and getting advertisers to pay…

This version of her face is better than it usually is.

I like everything except the boots. I don’t think the do her calves justice.

And wind up getting that plastic surgery that seems En Vogue with older women where they unintentionally look like cat people.

I CAN'T HELP IT THAT I'M ATTRACTIVE AND POPULAR.

Speaking as a formerly obese person who can’t have a body like the above blonde nightmare without super expensive surgery, I would say I would punch this woman in the nose, but I’ll be happy that she is probably a generally boring person who hates herself because all the breast implants in the world will never garner…

How could Andrew McCarthy from The Family get snubbed? Or anyone who tried really hard on that unfortunate trainwreck of a show? There needs to be an award for performing crazy good on something you know is getting cancelled.

That brunette in the front up there looks EXACTLY like a dude I used to get blackout drunk with 10 years ago. I HAVE TO MAKE SOME PHONE CALLS.

Sidenote: When people sign off on posts when it already shows who wrote the post. Better a dullard then an asshole I guess.

This is a good time to share a dialogue about our most shameful drunk cooking moments. I once battered and fried left over pizza in egg, cooked egg over it in, and made Pizza Benedict.

Don’t be such a Peggy Hill and get on the Dautrieve Train.

OMG we did a similar thing for pudding, and then got to eat the pudding, in 4th grade.

Ugh, unless there is an egg baked into the center it aint breakfast.