As a person who can’t even go twosies if people are in the same building, this is a very specific hell.

People who glorify the past never had to live without clean water. Like “back in the good old days” things were so much better! Yeah no. Having a purifying cooler/dispenser in our breakroom is a miracle and no one even realizes it thanks to the obliquity of sanitation.

Conservative politicians block all avenues for people to better themselves (from paid leave, education, and public transportation via rail, etc, to get to better employment), and want more babies to be borned? I don't understand how people can accept the logical paradox that is the Republican party.

My mom is deeply religious, but took great care in making us aware of HIV and Aids. She took us to see the quilt when it came to town, and I, an 8 year old little jerk, complained the entire time and she just nodded, even though a ton of her friends had died from the disease in the 80's.

I'd have that as well, along with Viennese sausage makers, but in the lobby, for my fans, I would have Let's Pizza and Let's Beer and Let's Truffle.

If I were a rich fancy person, I would have these in the lobby of my galant, pizza-theme estate.

Paycheck to paycheck ends up seeming normal

The only thing my parents still buy me are Winter coats and bed sheets, because its adorable. You better believe my mom keeps track of them.

Me: Dad, my college just called and I need 1000 dollars to go to class tonight. Do you have a 1000 dollars?

Oh shit now I remember where I was the other night. I have to make a phone call.

in third grade, I wanted to help with laundry and bleached all my new school clothes. My mothers blood curdling scream while she held the remains of my garments will stay with me forever.

Im drinking more because you can literally celebrate anything with Alcohol. Good week at work? Alcohol. Bad week at work? Alcohol. Oven timer just dinged for pizza rolls i need to eat because of alcohol? Definitely deserves a drink.

Had a horrible manager come up behind me and start rubbing my shoulders one morning along with some creepy compliments. Is this something they teach at Pervert University?

Coworker: always a bridesmaid never a bride?

As a semi processional southern bridesmaid, the most unattractive dress i wore was from a friend who despite other talents and being a wonderful person, couldmt figure out a proper design for everyone. We had different shapes, and since this was a religious affair, we were covered the fuck up. The lady hired to make…

Lol, she’s probably still miserable so there is always that. I lost a whole bunch of weight and her and another woman, though I was very thin, gossiped about my goofy fat arms and made me wear long sleeves.

They shut down almost all the clinics, and planned parenthood jacked up the cost of procedures.

So many things wrong with this comment. Can't even begin.

Michael Crichton's "The Asshole Gene".

I saw my father cry, something I'd only seen once before, after he heard about sandy hook.