i was born a poor black child.

Aww yeah. Fuck yeah. Leave the pants on, but give me your shoes.

Broad City, Key & Peele, Inside Amy Schumer, Drunk History, The Daily Show, South Park, Workaholics (most of the time), Nathan For You.

And Nick Swardson. It's a one-two punch of failed Sandler sidekicks.

Epic tour man. 9 days. Two days off.

#Berniemademehard

"Please don't."
-All of America

Because that what happens when some men see tits. It's called an erection.

Excellent puns and authentic Crypt Keeper plot.

I wasn't trying to say anything bad about your parents. Just meant that if they liked Royal Pains, then they probably liked other USA shows. Psych and Monk are the only ones I watched (Besides RAW(I know)). Rectify is great. If it was on AMC, then it would have so much more viewers and get the admiration that it…

I'm so sorry. Did they also watch NCIS marathons or Necessary Roughness or that lawyer show?

Maybe I was attacking Clapton, but I don't hate the guy. I just don't like his music. It's never been appealing to me, even though I agree he has done some good work as a special guest.

Hey, of the two of them, he certainly is the better Frank.

I never said I hated people for liking guitar rock. I said I don't like when people try to sell me on guitar rock. I've never been a fan of showboat music, and overly long solos and ridiculous breakdowns are atrocious to me. Rush and The Who are the two bands I can think of that I really like, but are packed to the…

Beyond All Star Superman and A Man For All Seasons, I haven't read one Superman story I liked. He is such a boring character, surrounded by an interesting world.

"This guy. lol."

Those aren't real titles, and I think you know that.

That's what all of America has been saying to the USA Network for years, but Royal Pains still continues to be a show no one you know watches.

Is the chicken as good as Chunky's Chicken?

That's the way I see it. He's like Bob Seeger. A guy just designed to exist solely in the past, and only appreciated by an older, constantly aging group of "cool" dads.