Sometimes it hits in the early 70s. For example, one of these hypothetical old people might confuse “Alabama” with “the Bahamas” and then spend a couple weeks saying he didn’t.

Warren/Castro has been my dream ticket since the first debate.

Ageist.

Gee, it’s almost like a lot of people in their late 70’s often suffer from a decline in their mental faculties which causes them to sound confused and forgetful and makes them poor candidates for almost any job where mental sharpness is a major factor.

I have, over the course of my life, known a handful of women who were sexually assaulted in some fashion. And this is just the ones who I knew well enough that they would share something like that, usually years after the fact. None of them reported their assaults to the police. 

Its amazing how men always know exactly how they would react and exactly what they would do if they were ever forcibly raped by a man (let alone a very famous man) when its something they have no reason to ever worry about.

Sign for a kid, he sells it on ebay once.  Dunk on a kid, he has a bar story for life.

Which would you really rather have when you grow up?

Man Injures Throwing Hand Throwing Hands.

got heeeeeeeeeem ::high five::

Yes,  That is correct.  Unlike Alabama, the Phillies pay their athletes.

31 home runs, 102 RBI (and now 10 outfield assists) for like $26 million this year.

Since 1 WAR is worth about 8 million dollars, and he’s at 3.6 WAR for the year making 25 million, he has outperformed year 1 of his contract in only five months.

Not the Antonio Brown come back story I expected.

Five bucks says the Patriots knew about this. Five more says the Raiders didn't.

The reason real he and Ben Roethlisberger didn’t get along was because they were too similar.

Awesome!

when in doubt point your finger in the air and hop a couple of times

Oh well, Acuna matata.

He thought it was a catch, but he failed to complete a “baseball move”.