“You think that’s bad—you should see my videos of the things they say at practice”

His new employer, recipient of four 2016 shutouts, also believes in not setting foot in opposing stadiums.

Can’t wait to see the look on everyone’s faces when Trump somehow gets in.

“Hotel Concierge...GARBAGE....Continental breakfast...GARBAGE....Cincy Police...GARBAGE....Nurse....GARBAGE”

“Transport the basketball”? Someone’s been reading The Book of Basketball Rings by Ted Cruz.

He probably got caught slamming another posse.

I can’t blame Nelson for wanting to stay on one side. You saw what happened to the last Viking who was fond of the switch.

2017: You thought 2016 was shit?

To his credit, Allen also called Santa Ana after their meeting to apologize again.

“If I had the ability to do so, I’d give this upstanding young man a chance to be a college football coach again.”

The Cubs will use this to draft prospects with really tight ligaments after bone breaks. I saw a documentary about twenty years ago that showed one such case.

I play racquetball, not squash, but similar enough in regard to not getting hit. You learn to be out of the way of another player’s swing and how to stay in control of your own. I’ve played for a long time and have never been hit with by a swing. The balls, on the other hand, have pegged me plenty. It hurts. Squash…

I guess that also explains why Drake and Steph are about half as freaked out as Chappelle.

“I guess I’m one of the mythical “undecided voters,” in that I am undecided as to whether I will vote at all... ...If the Democrats needed my vote I’d cast it, but they don’t, and so I don’t really know why I’d bother...” - Alex Pareene, ladies and gentlemen!

Fuck you, fuck me, fuck the sky, fuck trees, fuck the sun, I don’t need heat or vitamin D

The failure to close Gitmo, reform immigration, and (adequately) reform health care all fall on the Republican Congress that obstructed him for 6 years, openly rooting for him to fail so they could win the next election. And, thanks to the Democrats’ timeless stupidity and total lack of understanding of an average…

They bear some blame, but maybe people should have listened when the polls showed Bernie running better against Trump than Clinton did.

Van Jones is going to be an important voice going forward I believe. And I totally agree with him. All you have to do is check the poll numbers and it’s clear the people that Trump reached, certainly not minorities. This is a sad night for the country and truly speaks to what the majority think is important.

Love the name. My school has a big intramural hockey league, and the second years pick the nicknames that will be on the first years jerseys. Each year we pick the biggest d-bag from the first year class to be the FIGJAM. We’re now up to FIGJAM VII.

It certainly didn’t help that Manfred referred to the meeting as a “powwow”.