Need random, crazy goals out of nowhere? Bring back Suarez. Sell some old trophies to do it if necessary.

In the (present day) ABA, that would have been worth four. And well deserved.

Yugo, girl.

This deuce aint gonna pick itself.

Hey, let’s replace bunts with automatic outcomes, too. Just give up an out and advance the runners.

And almost all of the brouhaha over time wasting is caused by having to watch the fucking Red Sox and Yankees overthink every little thing 53 times a season on ESPN.

Absolutely stupid. Find me one person who will go to more games as a result of this.

My player piano!

Yeah, people in Chicago and Boston really hate those old parks.

He also destroyed Tiger Stadium, and I won’t ever forgive him for that.

I think you should have looked at the characteristics of all the competitors, then seen where the champions differ from the competition. Then who among this year’s contestants scores best on that axis?

To be fair, though, the media has to ignore all the real attacks because they make up so many fake ones like Sandy Hook. There’s just no time.

[cue Don Mattingly Simpsons paraphrase] I still like them better than Seattle fans.

It’s quite the trope on all sides - although far more on the right - to knee-jerk complain that [pet cause or ongoing event] is not being covered by the media. It’s really easy to say when you don’t bother checking any media to begin with. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve seen such a complaint on Twitter…

You are the best scoreboard operator this league has ever seen. That guy who used to do it circa 2012 was a complete joke.

I would totally be fired up for this Super Bowl if the NFL wasn’t such a hyper militaristic faux patriotic haven for toxic aggression.

Might as well get with the times. Lynching is all the rage again.

I still remember Sutton knocking out defending Cup winner Coventry City back in the day.

Really can’t speak on it. Disappointing when stuff that’s supposed to stay in the locker room gets out.

It’s both.