A blowjob? Eh, if I'm going Montreal to Toronto I'd rather just take Air Canada and feel like I'd been properly fucked.

Wait, are you trying to tell me that women on the internet are real and should be treated as such instead of like prostitutes in a video game?

More people need to come out and say how difficult marriage is.

Great point. I think a lot of people fail to see the complex ways in which religion affects peoples lives and just default to the "religion is stupid" end. You can't help somebody simply by telling them they're stupid.

Let me be super clear about this: I think everyone should be allow to love whomever they want and be a religious person. I don't think that religious sect of any kind should discriminate against gay people. With that being said, I understand how and why a person might decide they want to live within their communities…

Still makes more sense than Mormonism.

i'd like to submit this for best celebrity news story of 2014.

i am silently screaming

I pray to GOD this is true

Jia, this article is beautiful. And the pictures. I'm crying (from laughing) in my car obvs. Listening to Taylor Swift and drinking my peppermint mocha. You're doing god's work.

Life, you know? You don't get it, but that's okay.

She's amazing and I'm glad she's being honored. That is a heavy visual. People like her restore my faith in humanity.

Every time the name Emma comes up, I have to tell this anecdote.

Black People: Fuck this Lemon guy. We don't want him.

Ariana Grande spelled "cute" as "kewt" yesterday and I vomited a little in my mouth.

We really do live in a world where a subset of people firmly believe that access to guns and information about guns is not responsible for gun related crimes because the onus is on the individuals who act on access to guns and information about guns.... but at the same time, that even the mere mention of, let alone…

I'm totally OK if this comment section becomes solely Tosh-bashing.

"Someday my prince will cum."

I will be taking credit for Prince Eric, whom Kelly and I fought over like his was the last dick on earth. (And by that I mean we disagreed on what his penis looks like.)