He is the best dog ever! (I actually have two pups, and I love them both like crazy, but I honestly didn’t know it was possible to be as bonded with an animal as I am with Buster.) This is his “I love you more than life itself” look:

“...psychological break between ‘carrying around a gun and occasionally firing it at people’ and ‘I am killing someone.’”

Whenever I check in with the gun-toting nuts on my Facebook feed, their posts are all centered around the idea that gun owners are extremely responsible and competent individuals. After all, they know the technical difference between a rifle and and assault rifle, so only their opinions are valid, right? They know how…

Bieber wearing a Nirvana shirt makes me feel old, and I *hate* wet willies so maybe my distaste for him is biased.

I miss Joel McHale.

Probably Joel McHale. He’s a comedian, and Ryan Murphy is a notorious idea thief.

I wonder if each group of Housewives think they’re better than that other group of Housewives?

I lost 30 pounds in 7 days just by working at the home with the Internet! You can too- just follow this link:

Your child’s name can scream “teen mom” or “mcmansion pinterest housewife mom” or “artsy hister mom” or “single mother” or any number of things.

Also depends on your scalp. If it’s very dry, you have totally, totally different needs from a human oil factory like me. And someone who falls somewhere in between has yet other needs...

Sorry, I assumed “single-step process that cleanses and conditions the hair simultaneously” meant shampoo-conditioner mixture.

It cannot be done! They are diametrically opposed! One removes grease and one adds grease! Why anyone thought they could possibly be combined is beyond me and also makes me feel the need to use a lot of exclamation points!!!

I have searched the earth for a shampoo/conditioner combo that I can keep in my gym locker to cut down on the amount of stuff I have to keep in there. I’m still searching. I’ve never found one that doesn’t leave my hair a tangled mess of straw.

Trust someone named Chaz and this is what happens.

How could they do this? Simple. It’s called the law. Something you were supposed to uphold, not break.

I am REALLY LOVING this “IDGAF, I’m Saying It,” incarnation of Obama.

These two are getting divorced because he’s a narcissist and she is no longer the trophy he married.

no-holds-barred obama is the best obama

“If you run into an asshole in the morning, you ran into an asshole. But if you run into assholes all day, you’re the asshole.”

The hell you say!? Everyone knows all young women are desparate to sleep with middle aged dads. It’s just natural and in our genes!