Ummmm. I’m a mom. It’s not the most rewarding thing I’ve ever done. Oh my god, I sound like an asshole, don’t I? Jesus. Oh well.

This would have suited pre-marriage me perfectly. Affordable, free internet, air con, cheap to heat and cool, easy to clean, plenty of natural light, no damp, room for a bed and somewhere to sit and game, what more do you need?

Ban the wedding registry. Seriously. With the average age of people getting married slowly getting higher and higher and a majority of women (because that’s who the registry was originally for) have already lived on their own for a number of years anyway, wedding gifts and registries are a fucking joke for all the…

Go to the gift table, leave a card saying “What a beautiful day! I hope you enjoy the gift!”, then take half a dozen cards off their gifts, and scatter them.