Waitresses can be old.

Oh, is this the one about two young British sprinters competing for fame in the 1924 Olympics?

NJ.com has more about the incident:

Kringle. Kris Kringle.

He may be too injured to run on the field, but he can still run on his sentences.

Racing? With those skid marks, maybe they were just trying to start the Seahawks donut club.

Athletes generally should stay off social media during a game, but here Whalen could’ve have used a little Snapchat.

With Henson involved, how do we know this isn’t another attempt at the Fabulous Baseball Diamond?

Given the NSFW tag, it appears the Bengals aren’t covered enough in this article either.

Not as impressive as his brother Gary, in my opinion, but you know what they say, diff’rent strokes...

Nevermind. Not the first to post about President Dewey and probably won’t be the last.

And then this happened...

He who posted the article, hosted the farticle.

No, not at all. And I’m definitely Team Harper on this one.

“I don’t know Bryce Harper from Adam.”

Coins are nothing. Have you seen this guy?

This confused me, too. But I’m pretty sure it is Unidentified 1 that says “She hot?”, as the transcript says it was from “Second, unidentified police officer”. The comma making me think this is Unidentified 1. When Unidentified 2 is first introduced, he is referred to as “Second Unidentified Officer” without the comma.

Miss tutor . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . $10

Geno: IK, look at this. I think I twisted my neck weird.

Muphry’s Law