But thanks to this app, you can meet crazy murderers under false pretenses, and you’ll get murdered before you know what happened. FUN for ALL!

Someday those robots will kill us.

Should’ve seen the signs: Harassing chickens, chopping down shubberies, breaking pots, opening drawers, running into people while armed.

Setting wildfires? Pushing boulders on people? Link confirmed menace to society. Probably going to harass some birds and smash some pottery too.

We put our spider plants in hanging baskets to keep them out of reach of the cats, so they switched to chewing on the cactus. Apparently the kibble we get is less appetizing than a vegetable covered in spikes.

I’m sorry, I have to say something. I’m a Bernie supporter, and a longtime Jezebel reader, AND I was there in the room. I shot some videos that have been aired on major networks, and I actually have a relatively neutral perspective. Could you please interview me for an alternate view of what happened, instead of just…

First time in my life that I hear the phrase “Better than Super Metroid”.

that’s pretty funny...but it means going forward you can only purchase in whole dollar amounts...good luck with that

Is this fun?

This right here?

Their new console launched at $400. That's $200 cheaper than the rift.

Pay for a first class ticket. Or drugs.

“This is exactly the mobile game from Nintendo we wanted!” -Said no one ever

Current*

How can I afford this? Oh I know, credit. I’ll just charge this to my credit card, and that, I’ll charge that too. I’ll charge that thing over there too!

I would never be able to keep up with them. I guess they are codes I could photograph or email to myself. But if I kept them as a physical pritend code? Lost under 3 months.

I would never be able to keep up with them. I guess they are codes I could photograph or email to myself. But if I…

Just remember, with this method there is a limit to the time you can safely leave a candle: ~30 minutes. The solid top traps heat, melts, burns, and does all sorts of bad things on your porch.

Fun WILL be had, understood?

I don’t remember the first time I heard peaches and their ilk referred to as “stone fruit” but I feel like it was a while ago. Who knows though! Like you said, all that really matters is that they are very delicious.