This?

Whatever you do, don’t make him angry...

Player.FM does everything I could need. Speed adjustments, quiet downloading in the background, and not too bad of a battery drain.

Grosser than *cleaning* a toilet brush?

I don’t know, sometime’s I’ve gotta wonder if all that lost time and waiting is worth it with sous vide.

I’m saving this.

First World problem?

Matilda, apparently (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0117008/). I just googled “messy chocolate meme” and up that came. Apparently the grown-up version of the kid looks nothing like 12-year-old Bruce:

Ladies and gentlemen, thanks to this tasty snack, may I introduce...