I searched “below average” and got a nice selfie.

#EveryAnthemMatters +1

Remember, kids: Midterm elections exist and they matter. Get out and vote this year, and then do it again in 2018.

Mee mother mee moo moids moo midenmimied mare mot mammom mexammles.

This wasn’t the gif I was looking to post for you, but I found it and now need a lightsaber-wielding mama polar bear to off Trump.

Ah yes. Vote for the guy who wants to eliminate the corporate income tax, gut business regulations, destroy the social safety net, privatize the entire prison industry, and leave healthcare entirely in the hands of private business.

Needs more Zubaz.

But they’re Nice Guys!

Futurama is right again!

The only reason he joined Twitter is because someone told him he could block people.

“Robert E. Lee” came in second.

I. Fucking. Hate. The. *TOXIN* Babble.

*sits back and waits for mitten to explain what Trump’s policies actually are?*

So some redneck wrote a letter to Cam Newton that this guy cut and pasted and it’s funny since JJ Watt is white? My bad.

RBIs! Yes! Take that you fucking Rs-B-I heathen fucks!

What ever happened to standing outside her window with a boom box playing Peter Gabriel? Fucking millenials.

The only thing that stops a bad offensive lineman with a gun is a good defensive lineman with a gun. #tcot

I was with you until your weird three-shells towel sesh. Separate towels is overkill.

RE: Getting out of the shower: I don’t understand why people do this either. My wife, who is otherwise a wonderful person, soaks the entire bathmat, bathroom, and half of our bedroom every time she steps out of the shower. I don’t even understand how her body can physically hold that much water on its surface.