Did you bring enough champagne for the entire class?

Try living in Texas sometime.

Who (Ben Carson). Will (Ben Carson). Drop (Ben Carson). Out (Ben Carson). Next?! I’ll give you a hint: he has an affinity for hammers.

I’m not entirely sure who my mom is for currently, I know she was for Jeb! (cue Price is Right fail music), but I don’t know who she is for now. My dad has actually stated outright that he doesn’t really like anyone currently running. I 100% get secular conservatives who have had enough of Republican party’s religious…

All the stars for you.

I see someone’s a fan of John Oliver.

I got Dumbledore! You know what? I might have taken the wrong quiz.

What gives me a LITTLE bit of hope is that my Republican parents aren’t for Trump.

“Heritage” is one of those words that’s been co-opted by fuckers like this into meaning “whites only.”

He’s clearly following in the footsteps of Sarah Palin and using Trump for grifting as well as trying to maintain relevance.

‘Merica, fuck yeah!

I have an aunt who I thought, was one of the more reasonable Republicans (they exist, as so the legend goes) is for Trump.

It is our civic duty to show articles like this to all the sane people in our lives.

That’s the Trump campaign in a nutshell: it was funny until it suddenly wasn’t funny anymore.

Aww, Atheist God bless him.

I just wanted to be absolutely sure, is Ben “hammer time” Carson still running?

Trump is a disingenuous bigot who has no core principles. Cruz, on the other hand, has some very bigoted core principles. But, Cruz is more dangerous because he’s doing it all in the name of the Jeebus.

In Cruz’s case, it’s more that his creepy as fuck dad has been planning this for year and years and years.

Speaking as a former asshole teenager, I agree. This swatting phenomenon is some fucked up shit.

I’m 23 and had no fucking idea what this shit was.