RIP, Arnie.

If he’s wearing an NFL hat, I’m thinking that’s the concussion protocol doctor. Which leads to the question, do they have a concussion protocol doctor for the concussion protocol doctor?

Palmer was beloved during his career because of his blue collar swing and go for broke style of play, but it was the way he treated people that made him a legend. He was gracious, generous, and gentlemanly. He never turned away an autograph seeker and had the knack for making anyone in his company feel important. The…

Their brothers?

Meanwhile Canadian college teams have begun a bidding war over mysterious newcomer Les Kilometers.

Les Miserables

That kicker reminds me of a young Peyton Manning out there

Thoughts and prayers with the real victim of that wipeout, Art Briles.

If you look closely at the people being crushed in the stampede, you will find that Art Briles is the real victim here.

This is part of a scam this woman runs. She keeps the ducks there, luring the bears in and then catches the bears and will only release them for a ransom.

“What’s So Bad About Eating Some Cucks? The Ted Cruz Story”

-forthcoming, Fall 2016, Simon & Schuster

So she talks about bears in more modest terms than her ducks? Or is it that she just likes to rhyme when the opportunity presents itself?

And the raw, animal charisma of a bowl of tapioca pudding.

no-swim-away, no-swim-away, no-swim-away, no-swim-away

Aim-n-whack, Aim-n-whack. Aim-n-whack. Aim-n-whack

+1 aweemaway

hush my dolphin
don’t fear, my dolphin
the motherfucker died tonight

In the coral
The mighty coral
The lionfish dies tonight

The right to swing your pie ends where the other man’s nose begins.

For my jailhouse interview, I want my description line to say “Pie Eater”. Let the viewers wonder which pie.