Started at the bottom, now I’m.... still here, Dad.

I think the secret villain in this story is Giant Black Rectangle.

Headline from 2017: “Average score across league now at 17-14; NHL looks for ways to cut average length of game below 3 hours”.

I’ve got a prospect for you.

Didn’t they already do this several years ago? Not that I’m complaining, because I think it’s a positive change....

Tee-Ball Tee With A Glove Stuck To It is getting some reps at 3rd on the minor league fields. Just sayin’.

That’s..... totally a fair description. Today on Trollin’ with Volin, “The Patriots have never won a Super Bowl without at least one Hall of Fame-caliber player on the roster. Call me when they win a REAL title.”

No, that’s what they think of T from Q. It was a little unclear; I apologize.

/high five

Sir, allow me to introduce you to this thing called “Red Sox spring training”.

They’re talking about Gronk’s contract because it’s a refreshing break from talking about how many errors Fat Pablo made in a meaningless game this afternoon, or proactively concluding which free agent signings are catastrophic failures…

I’ll just go ahead and assume you’re in the Mob, then!

Actually, no — the Shaughnessys of the world have even more contempt for Tawmy from Quinzeee than Deadspinners do. They’re all homers who swallow whatever Kool-aid Foxboro is dispensing these days, etc. etc.

The Boston media is now crushed that they’ve been deprived of their opportunity to write several dozen articles each week about how greedy and unappreciative Chandler Jones is, and how cheap Bob Kraft is wasting Brady’s glory years by refusing to pay his players.

“This is the strongest field in years. I’m not even going to try to put odds on a winner.”

The NFL wants you to get your “highs” in the old-fashioned, manly way: by slamming your head repeatedly into another man until your brain doesn’t work right.

This has Ewing Theory written all over it. I bet the Sixers go on a 3-15 run now....

The next time I let irrelevant things like “facts” get in the way of a good USC-related diss will be the first.

Matt Leinart shattered all of Sanchez’s records at USC.

He also played football.

Your process to suck?