My wife pants’d me a few years ago and broke her finger doing it. (Hooked in the elastic waistband of my sweats.) Worst injury explanation EVER. 

For some reason I find that gross little slicked down bit of hair over his ears to be one of the most disgusting things I’ve seen. 

I guess that’s the answer to the question “how can I get my Saab’s transmission to go out twice as fast?” 

The most underrated thing about the Portland airport is the Port of Portland policy that requires restaurants in the airport to charge the exact same prices they charge outside the airport. This means that not only is the food super good, but reasonably priced as well. 

“Foray,” “masticating,” “venture,” “dissipated”... it’s hard to see how this guy isn’t absolutely swimming it, given the sexxxy way he writes about bonin’ and bangin’. 

People also cling to POC in their lives as a reason for why they are NOT racist. “I can’t be racist, my sister in law is black,” etc. 

I’m ambivalent about him *for President* but would fund the shit out of his campaign if he quit tomorrow and announced he was running against that absolute fraud John Cornyn for Senate. 

My random Matt Nokes story: he went to my junior high school, probably 10 years before me, so when he had his great rookie year, I naturally figured that a book in our library that had his name in it would be worth money, so I went through *every book in the school library* and looked at the table in the inside cover…

I get the joke, but c’mon, every guy knows that she’s “on a journey” with the other guys, and it’s all on the table. It’s not like each guy is filmed in isolation, under the impression he’s the only one. 

Maverick’s comin’ for ya, Sudan!!

The arbiter, you say?

They’re also legally required to roll their eyes when anyone refers to a (a) US politician, (b) US holiday, (c) US monument or other relic of historic importance. 

With the exception of anyone you’re related to, and your partner, I feel like there should be an “unless they’re hot” after each one of these.

I’ve had this problem as well...it is super annoying when trying to do anything in BOTW, for example. (Using a bow and arrow is all but impossible.) I cleaned them by taking some alcohol swabs and just vigorously rubbing around the base of the joystick(s), and then using compressed air can to blast everything in the…

Buzz Aldrin’s heart rate was 88 bpm at liftoff, which is...insane. Mine is higher when I get an email from my boss. 

“The first plane we got on was trash. After an hour and a half on the tarmac, they let us know that the plane had a malfunctioning engine. We deboarded and had to wait more hours for a new plane. Right before boarding that new plane, we were informed the new plane was ALSO trash.”

“Not true.”

Question: where do you live? I ask this because I grew up in San Diego where we had amazing tomatoes for a good % of the year, but then I moved to the midwest for college and there’s a much smaller window there for getting good tomatoes, and I found myself asking places to hold the tomatoes because most of the time…

I think at this point it’s a certainty that they are not operated by the US government in any way, because there is no chance that our current president would be able to resist blabbing about this amazing technology we’ve got every time he found himself in front of a camera or some dictator he wanted to impress.