Is he German?

It's like the Book of Revelations started talking about basketball.

In a very real way, perhaps his greatest legacy. Certainly his most impressive achievement.

"I had a friend was a baseball player
Back in high school..."

"120 Sports, a division of Entertainment 720."

Matt! Er...yes, we should connect! I'm trying to figure out the dang commenting system here to send you a private message, but can't get the hang of it. I'll keep trying. Thanks for writing!

I'm sure there is some sanctimonious asshole sportswriter out there who will happily tell you that he was one of the few who cast a no vote for Tony's HOF vote. That "nobody should be a unanimous first ballot HOFer" is one of the very worst of baseball's many unwritten rules.

That is one goofy ass Carrot Top looking motherfucker.

Because college sexual assault involves alcohol like 95% of the time, is almost always bound up in lots of fairly complex social factors (the guy who assaulted you is really good friends with a bunch of your friends and you are worried they'll dump you as a friend if you publicly accuse him, etc.), and in very many…

The thing that is baffling is that these cases usually involve the standard of "more likely than not," as opposed to "beyond a reasonable doubt" in criminal cases. It could be that this college has a higher standard than "more likely than not," however, in which case the sanctions may actually match the findings. If…

The police file charges based on the criminal code, while colleges pursue charges based on violations of college policy. So the cops could put you in jail, whereas the school will expel you. Colleges are now expressly prohibited from telling victims (it's not just women!) that they should not file charges with the…

Gilbert went big—he broke out the Curlz MT font for this one.

Basically Friedman stayed up late watching "Strange Brew" again, and this column is our punishment.

Shouldn't you be out in Nevada protesting with Cliven Bundy?

I like how it takes most people a second to realize that this is a gif, not an image. SHE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT YOUR SHITE OLYMPICS.

I am NOT beginning to doubt THEIR commitment to Sparkle Motion.

And you know that nobody raped her because.... ??? Note that "[Redacted] woke up in a hospital bed and doesn't remember how she got there or who transported her to the hospital" means that (a) she blacked out and lots of time is missing from the timeline, and (b) she got checked out at the hospital and DNA would have…

I don't really know what you're trying to say here. There are comparatively fewer mass casualty incidents with knives than there are with guns, mostly because it takes lots more effort to attack someone with a knife.

This is patently untrue. Colleges have any number of reasons to care about the safety of their students, and most do. This article talked about all of two colleges. You may think that colleges are cynical about the issue, or are motivated by the wrong things (fear of losing a lawsuit, for example), but the colleges…

BREAKING NEWS: Guy Who Never Watched a Show Does Not Understand Many of the References When He Finally Gets Around to Watching an Episode.