Pfft no one saw Elysium.

Those “artificial genitals” deliver valuable information. Whenever you see truck nuts in the back, you know there’s a dick in the front.

The tip to the rental company was when the vehicle was returned with no panel gaps.

Food, you say?

The dog owner has recently been seen at a local bank asking if they can make change for penny.

If is was manual, this never would have happened.

There’s a reason Fallon inherited Leno’s chair and Colbert got Letterman’s.

Come on guys, all I want to do is clown around with my celebrity friends, while getting paid gobs of money, and not have to pretend that any of what is happening in the country on a daily basis is going to have the slightest negative impact on me. Can’t you respect that?

It reminds me of Jean-Pierre Melville, the director who fought in the Resistance during the War.

The Air Force isn’t stonewalling or prevaricating on this? They are just admitting their mistakes? What a strange thing to do in Trump’s America.

Fancy Kristen uses a Ferrari to light other cars on fire.

Gotta love the fact that the reason Trump is opposed to Jones is because he’s “soft on crime,” all while endorsing an actual criminal, and the worst kind, to top it off.

It would be pretty fun if they gave it to Putin this year and the article was basically about how Trump is his ineffectual pet. Given the latter’s obsession with being regarded as important, depicting him as a pawn AND robbing him of the Person of the Year award could potentially disrupt his love party with the…

He would totally get the “Me” part.

Who thought that would be a good idea?

It took me a while, but I caught up eventually!

Despite growing up near Yellville, I never attended Turkey Trot because we always shot our own turkey each November. It’s pretty easy really. They just sit there and don’t move much. You just have to wait until you have a clear shot. They’re always grouped together and I never missed.

Pop quiz, hotshot. There’s a photo bomb on a bus. What do you do?

MLK was pretty unambiguous about this in his writing.

hard