“...you put it in reverse and drag the brake a little bit while gently adding power. The brakes will balance the resistance between the drive wheels, ...”

How are things over at The Onion, by the way? Getting enough Pop Tarts stocked in the vending machines?

“...so far up there, I can’t tell the difference between his farts and your opinions!”

No fair— those maggots writhing around in his brain account for an extra IQ point or two.

Homophone, not homonym.

The soldiers on D-Day brought hope to a country that was suffering under a fascist regime.

Trump: “Amagerd. My hands are sooo big when I do this... oh, no. Now I’m stuck.”

“Jesus! When you told me that Kodos was into that sort of shit, I didn’t think you meant literally...”

I kind of like the notion of humanity being one of the very first races to attain sapience and scientific cognizance in the galaxy. But only because it’d be a hoot to go against the science fiction trope of later races regarding the ancient forerunners who first ventured forth into the stars as a people of…

The plus side to Trump’s ability to slither out of formal indictment is that it gives the crooks around him the illusion that they are just as invulnerable by proxy.

My car goes around the world every day.

Not fair, considering the roadster was hypermiling from the push given to it by the Falcon.

When everyone has four-wheel stop, then four-wheel drive gives you absolutely nothing extra over everyone else.

“Captain to the bridge!”

Which would then place the burden and liability squarely on the President’s judgement.

My first-ever drink was a vodka martini, olive and all. They could have served me a glass of gasoline and I wouldn’t have known the difference.

In the Mass Effect universe, human shuttlecraft are reknowned for their survivability all because they had to pass just one test: Will it land on Venus?

We’d have to learn Russian in order to troll them effectively. Who’s got the time to do that?

Heck, they stole the OK sign as well.

Reminds me of the way movie studios tried to sell the idea that TV waves beaming into your home would turn families into literal zombies. Which turned out to be wrong, as the zombification was merely a metaphorical process instead.