I don’t know if it’s a directive from the editor, or just a case of colleagues adopting each other’s literary styles, but the constant “dunked his soul to hell” and “smacked the ball to the goddamned moon” shit is fucking exhausting and not remotely funny anymore.

this is the point at which the Deadspin headline voice has officially become a parody of itself.

You guys are trying WAY too hard at this point.

Some blacklight posters, maybe a lava lamp.

Ratto just took Thiesen, Burneko, and Thompson’s lunch money and forced them to sit at the same table while he ate.

Thank you! Finally someone speaking sense!

Pelicans fan here. Everyone can kiss my ass he’s our hostage. 

I read “shooting permit” as a permit to shoot a film, not carry a gun, but with Herzog one should never be too sure.

Nah, Shooter McGavin was actually good at golf.

I don’t think Nurkic meant anything by the t-shirt, it’s actually just a Jim Carroll Band t-shirt customized for each tour stop, and he happened to attend the Sarajevo show.

It’s really hard to argue with that immediate payday, and I can’t fault him for it.

I would personally take the signing bonus from the A’s knowing full well I could live off of it for the rest of my life, bounce around the minor leagues and maybe even make the majors, have some fun, enjoy the clubhouse spread and…

Can you imagine lucking into a situation where you get to ride LeBron James to a championship, then being out of work for a year because everyone knows you’re not that great of a coach and you rode LeBron James to a championship, and then, because the front office of a team trying to ride LeBron James to a…

Ok, first of all, Patrick studied rocks at Berkeley. Second of all, he’s not smarter than anyone.

I was genuinely curious when I saw this headline how you would link Koch’s firing to a criticism of MLS’ expansion strategy, so credit where credit is due for a unique angle even if it’s leading to a dead-horse destination.

That said, am I the only one confused by how you can simultaneously argue that MLS should…

“presumable” because I haven’t watched a minute of MLS this season so I’ve not had the chance to subject his performances to my own visual examination

Counterpoint: We’re talking about the Stanley Cup Playoffs, so it has nothing to do with Canada anyway.

I bet all his tweets go viral.

Jones has all the right attributes: Will, Height, Intelligence, Tenacity, Eye-hand coordination.

“Maybe we’re going to be the Green Bay Model, where Rodgers sat for three years. Who knows?”

I have great difficulty understanding how pathetic one must be to go to a football stadium to watch the NFL Draft. This is the equivalent of people in the ‘90s camping out in front of their local Tower Records to be the first to buy the new album by, like, Everclear.