Cruz/CromartieKidsClub 2016!

We needed France’s help to win the Revolution.

...and Reuters approves.

You invaded Canada and lost to start the war, the white house got burnt down. Can’t say it was a US win.

Let the IRS guy have his 5-minutes. It’s about time that the US government stopped treating professional (but non-profit) sports as the moral compass of society. Plus- he probably made a super kick-ass pivot table that cracked the case wide open.

A brief history of FIFA.

That’s nothing. Go to work for FIFA and rake in millions!!!!

Necessary:

That’s what you think but I clicked the link and was immediately teleported to a BMW dealership.

This really is the world cup of spam and we’re issuing a red card.

@RossOCK: BREAKING: Swiss Police confirm that, when arrested, all seven FIFA

“Oh shit, he’s really gonna say it.”

This only illustrates the twisted priorities of the Justice Department while the plague of flopping goes unchecked.

FIFA didn't hear that because they were rolling around on the turf holding their ankle like they lost a foot ... Only to quickly jump up and sprint away as soon as things cool down.

“It really is the World Cup of Fraud, and today we are issuing FIFA a red card.”

Hey, he tried. A non athletic, geeky, small jewish guy gave it a shot. That’s all we can ask for.

FIFA is the World Cup of corruption and we are issuing a red card.

“This truly is the ‘World’s Cup’ of fraud.”

My God, I can’t believe I actually typed that.

Yes, this terrible pun is completely representative of “us,” and unhip government functionaries only exist in America.

Wow, you really are a soccer fan.

Somewhere, Chuck Schumer is wishing he'd made that joke.