Must be visiting BYU

I’m sympathetic to Kings fans here. I’m a Rangers and Knicks fan, so it’s always a bit depressing to go to a game and look up to the rafters to relive my teams’ recent glories like “Billy Joel Most Consecutive Performances” and “Billy Joel Most Lifetime Performances.”

I suppose the bright side is that she could have been soaked in much worse in the clubhouse in Oakland.

Are we sure that’s not just a member of the Gase clan?

A butt fingering would have been a lot more exciting than this game.

I mean, I’m pretty sure a bigger reason is that the Pats won it 15 years ago.

That’s a great idea, but it’s getting awfully crowded up in those rafters.

In a sense, isn’t that a metaphor for Indianapolis as a whole? At least it’s not Detroit? Also, their regional delicacy is somehow 18-alarm cocktail sauce.

Eric Gregg is looking up and smiling right now.

And I doubt you could Family Feud the name of the current pope

I feel like that whole “No depictions of him ever or woe unto you” thing probably hurts Muhammad in the fame department vs. Jesus who, say what you will, knew how to brand.

“The arresting officer said he was ‘full of piss and minegar.’”

Whoa calm down there with your kinky fantasies, Suzyn. 

How long do you think they kept a straight face when they told him he got traded to New York?

When the options to respond are limited to “I am too incompetent to look into who my business partnerships are” and “I don’t care who I partner with, so long as I get paid” there’s not really a good answer, I suppose.

Who is her "team"? The Knicks?

If your “team” is presenting you with “opportunities” and they aren’t vetting who those opportunities are with and/or telling you the details, get a new team. Holy shit. PR 101.

At least the Red Sox chose a brand to honor Ted Williams at the same time.

You think they’re gonna give the usmnt non stop flights? Pssh good luck with that, buddy.