And I always thought going from Florida to Alabama was in the opposite direction of the Underground Railroad.

Funny, it's usually a Dick that shoots an absolute pearler.

God, the kicker is that the advanced stats make Joe Morgan's career look all the more impressive. He was worth 10+ wins each season from 1972-76 according to Baseball Prospectus as a second baseman, and is 18th all-time in WARP.

@FavreFAIL: Deadspin UK's Comment Ninja says the exact same thing to his cigarettes.

To be fair, Kwame Brown was worth about a pack of cigarettes to the Wizards.

"And if you look to your right, Mr. Pena, you'll see the Jungle Room where Mr. Presley usually had a mistress waiting for him, much like your Chilean miner friend once he reached the surface."

@Hatey McLife: +1. That joke was a gas.

Also, Murray Bannerman's mask denies responsibility for the defeat at Little Bighorn.

@OchentaYcinco: Mileage always helps with clothes. I will have my 'Number 3 at Citi' shirt for a very long time.

@Eddie Murray Sparkles: Or Boston Pizza* representatives.

"You could have watched an exciting, important game, a tense changing of the guard of the best playoff pitchers ever."

@Dandy Koufax:

@Same Sad Echo: Brian Hickey is still an animal apparently.

@titansfan78: Captain also appreciates the last name blurring.

Now I know where the name Ken Tremendous comes from.

@CumaeanSibyl: Which makes games like this still seem repugnant to this day.

I was at Giants Stadium for that game yesterday, and I was terrified for the guy immediately. His legs weren't moving and there was no thumbs-up as he was carted off the field.

@Desi_Relaford: My old TV's weird, whenever I press the SAP button I don't get a Spanish broadcast, I actually get crowd noises and the game sounds without any commentary. I enjoy it immensely.

He has 11 goals in 10 Seria A games thus far. God damn, he's good.

@Sapphire and Chronic: A sinewy bottle of despair known as Coors Light.