Dire Straits*

Twenty+ years of corporate retail. Midwestern corporate retail. Kill me now.

“...we are already hirinig [sic] for several new positions now.”

He’s streamlining resources to ensure talent is maximized to enhance the customer experience.

I totally get what she’s saying. It’s not that cancer is no biggie, it’s that it’s no biggie compared to having a serious mental illness.

Did you have a dog?

Green eggs and blam!

Raise your hand if you ever had a Palm Pilot

Haha, I always make myself read the articles because I want to be informed if I comment, but I'm basically just in it for the comments.

Roughly 60% of the time i just scroll through the articles and read the comments. Don't tell anyone.

Honestly the Jezebel comment section is my favorite thing on the whole internet. I love you all more than i love Jezebel itself.

Only Michelle can give you side eye while LOOKING RIGHT AT YOU!!

GWB: Selma's the gal that wouldn't get off the bus, right?

Best First Lady Ever, or Best First Lady Of All Time...?

That reminds me of this:

Q about oil products: I gave those up back in the '80s because my skin just absolutely could not cope. It gave me enough PTSD to never try them again. Are today's oil products better on acne-prone skin?

The best smokescreen for gossip that Southerners (especially Southern Baptists) have come up with is the prayer request.

I'll probably get flamed for this...

Stuff you need to know about menopause (but remember, every single woman is different, and your results will vary):