He better put the ride back in bride.

Axe body spray.

Today IS weird. I felt like shit all day, with constant cramps, sore boobs, nausea, dizziness... Even took a pregnancy test to make sure my mirena’s not fucking with me.

I’m having a torturous day today, full of anxiety and impatience and sadness and looping negative thoughts. I can’t seem to shake it. My vodka lemonade, while delicious, isn’t helping. And, also, I know this sounds weird, my best friend found out that he has this flesh eating bacteria. Today is weird, right? Something…

DOGGIES!!! WHOSAGOODDOGGIE???? YES YOU ARE!!!!

It seems like, these days that you must be all one thing or the other. There’s no room for middle ground (Even around Gawker media if we’re being honest.). It’s completely okay to hold two viewpoints that may not on the surface seem compatible. It’s totally alright to dislike Gretchen for the odious things she’s said…

Last night, when I was giving out cake, the Son in Law said that she shouldn’t be allowed to sue because she chose to continue working there. I literally took the fork out of his hand and said that he can’t have any until he pulls his head out of his ass. I’m not fooling around with these people anymore. No more aid…

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I wouldn’t be surprised if you panicked about the fact that you were once pregnant with Justin Bieber’s baby for the rest of your life.

There’s a giant wookie sheepdog in my neighborhood that my dog is obsessed with. Whenever my dog sees him it’s like when the bold explorers of the “Starship Enterprise” run into aliens who, miraculously, look to be of the same species as humans but there’s something…

My first thought was sympathy for Rory and the rest of her family. My second thought was “maybe this finally means I can stop seeing constant posts about it!”

FFS. Dude is grieving. He’s probably hanging on by his fingernails right now, and that’s keeping him going. He has a small child without a mother to raise her. It’s a shitty situation, and that belief is getting him through.

This is..entirely too accurate. And this is why other countries just can’t with us.

It won’t be the only thing they remember, Amanda. My husband died in 2009. He was a writer, a historian, a genealogist, and a storyteller. He was much beloved in his community. He lived for 3 years after his diagnosis. The last year was pretty tough - but that isn’t what people remember. They remember the stories he…

Jesus H., people.

Oh, hell yeah.

Jesus Christ, could they all just hump his corpse and be done with it?

Absolutely fuck those people victim blaming, and saying, “if you don’t want pictures out there,” nonsense.