The good news is that he passed his Texas Tech entrance exam with flying colors.

FANDUEL

The best part? Bumgarner is doing nothing wrong. He’s watching the ump from the mound, waiting for him to get into position so he can begin his delivery.

Who in their right mind wouldn’t be playing a Tony Hawk game at least a little high?

This makes me absurdly proud to be a Masshole. That accent and all those F-bombs ring like soft bells of joy in my ears.

That’s a pretty bad JPP joke.

They are who we expected them to be.

It’s not Chicago, moron.

Yes

Beer is the gateway drug.

“JET FUEL CAN’T MELT A MOTHER’S PRIDE!”

The mention of “The 12s” is easily the most intolerable part of this saga

...what? Who doesn’t like pie AND cake?

Oh well, probably everyone here is a bunch of fucking Cubs and Cardinals fans

Ah yes, the NFL’s new domestic abuse policy of, “pics or GTFO.”

Did the photographer strap a GoPro to his dick or what?

Any time someone over 50 starts giving me directions I immediately inform them that I am not listening and will just plug it into the GPS on my phone and they just kind of nod and smile and continue with “then your gonna get to a BP station about a mile down and you wanna turn....LEFT...before the light...should be…

This. Once, my GF filled up my water bottle while I was in the shower (we have opposite schedules), and even though it’s a wide-mouth Nalgene, she didn’t put any ice in it, just whatever room-tempish cold water came out of the faucet. I mentioned it to her when I got home, and now I fill up my own goddamn water bottle.