But at least he didn’t steal forty cakes. That would have been as many as four tens. And that’s terrible.

So, grab them by the Donald Trump during the Vietnam War?

The man failed miserably selling gambling, football, and steak.

I plan on tricking him into giving it to us.

U.S. Soccer is a bunch of hypocrites considering Tim Howard has been blurting out inappropriate things his entire career.

Somehow this will end up being your fault

It’s Bridget Reagan, from her time on the amazing Agent Carter.

I read this and was like, yeah that sounds about right.

I’ve got a friend that’ll help:

Not enough upgrading armor sequences.

Executive #1: “DC isn’t as popular as Marvel. What are our options?”

“That thing does not obey the laws of physics at all!”

This guy must be reading a different bible than we’re familiar with, because there is no way the Jesus described in any of the bibles I grew up reading would have been cool with this.

Counterpoint:

If I say the sky is blue and you say its made of giant swinging dicks that doesn’t mean our points are equally valid.

This initially made me laugh out loud but then I almost started crying because it is not out of the realm of possibility in a land led by Trump.

I 100% do not think this is a joke and I have not for a real long time, this shit is fucking terrifying

I have a truly boring job- without going into the whole routine of it let’s focus on the part that is scaring the beejeebers out of me right now. I read introductory business profiles and these people are starting to write their profiles pretty much the same way that Trump speaks. I mean, overlooking the spelling and…

I build really tall walls with my Legos all the time. Easy peasy lemon squeezy.

But first he will tell Ted to “pull my finger".