I agree with everything you wrote, but as a professional, contrarian asshole, I have to point out that “Jordan Rules” means something totally different from your usage.

In a year when NARRATIVES became more prevalent and stupid than ever, it’s neat to see an arc in sports that’s an actual story played out over time.

I don’t play golf and I’ve never had a Long Island.

What’s the problem? One MVP with the Lakers and his second with the srekaL.

I’m not a big sports memorabilia guy, but I own a pair of game-worn Oakley sneakers because he was my favorite player growing up.

An amazing series for LeBron and an amazing career. He’s an all-time great who deserves all the praise.

Anybody know of a good link for tonight’s Game 7?

Well, Finn’s not wrong since football is a terrible sport.

The ball definitely moved, right?

Thinking the majority of men consider women mere window dressing is not realistic. It’s cynical.

Jesus, you’ve got a cynical outlook.

“I’d love to hear how this ruined Vin Scully for you. Did he make false statements?”

Step 1: Distort or ignore the article’s thesis to create an opportunity to showcase your photography knowledge.

I saw Jack White at Red Rocks two years ago (he was great).

Being a heel requires self-awareness, an attribute Rose is remarkably bereft of.

“Every team they beat in the Finals was as good if not better than Golden State.”

Pete Rose is such a stupid, unlikable fuck.

Bitch, please. Tricks is what yo’ momma turn.

“This guy’s name sounds like that guy’s name.”

This is beyond insane, and is the kind of thing that makes me cringe as a liberal.