I stopped reading HuffPo years ago when I noticed the way they format headlines made everything seem worse than it actually was. When I read “Stock Market Falls,” I say “yeah, that happens” and move on. When I read “STOCK MARKET NOSE DIVE!!!!!!! WALL STREET IN CHAOS!!!!!!!!” I freak out, check my 401(k) balance and…

I occasionally employ woo woo to help with symptom control while also pursuing actual medical treatment. It’s called complementary medicine and it has its place but thanks to these “lemons cure diabetes” dipshits, I pretty much keep it secret that I do so. I know Doo Doo Terra doesn’t cure shit and don’t need the…

Something like this satanic abuse shit could so easily happen again. I think as a society we’re now even more susceptible to it than 30 years ago. (And by susceptible, I mean fucking stupid.)

Det. Pembleton to witness who’s a airline pilot: “We may have some follow up questions. Don’t leave town.”

Thanks to Facebook, laetrile is making a comeback. Even knowing the friend who shared the post touting it, I was still surprised.

I was just scrolling down to say “Nope. That ain’t him.”

Haha, I’m the picky spouse except I’m single. “Does this have cardamom in it?” “Like, 1/8 teaspoon. Hardly any.” “I TASTE CARDAMOM. I’M NOT EATING THIS.” This also applies with turmeric, dill, and probably a number of others I’ll remember I hate when someone mentions them.

I mostly just keep the stuff I really like and use frequently.* If a recipe calls for something I don’t have, I usually substitute or skip it.

I’m already taking the blame for Trump and now I gotta take the blame for this too? Shee-it.

I got yelled at by Guggenheim security for just getting close enough to a Cezanne to read the damn placard. These people break shit and just walk out.

When I’m job hunting I frequently have to fly to interviews because jobs in my profession are few and far between. The ONE time I checked my bag for an interview (ONE TIME!) of course they fucking lost it.

I love any chance to tell this story: as a teenager leaving for a trip, I got into a knock down drag out with my stepmother, who felt very strongly that I was underdressed for travel. My offense was wearing a plain t-shirt over a skirt and under a nice cardigan. I refused to change and she was a hosebeast to me all…

When those Facebook posts started, I started wondering if some people think the eclipse itself is eye-damaging rather than staring directly at the sun, which we’re only inclined to do during an eclipse.

But will my cats go blind if I let them outside? :D

I don’t remember the brand name but could pick it out on the shelf. For a while I was buying my cats a food that if I were really hungry and you put it on a nice plate and didn’t say it was cat food, I would have eaten it. It was like opening a can of tuna except it was variety of meats.

Is there a GoFundMe or other for Ms. Corley’s legal costs?

AFAIK, most jurisdictions have guidelines for cavity searches and I highly doubt this fucking travesty followed them. I don’t think I’ve read anything else on this site that has upset and angered me as much as this.

Hair removal is, to me, the least sexy thing ever. Except for maybe pooping or vomiting. Imagining a partner performing my hair removal is a good appetite suppressant.

That stuff is fantastic on my face, though. I’ve removed hair so short that professionals couldn’t do it.

It’s a long story why but I occasionally trim with nail scissors and I’m never more careful than I am when I’m operating scissors near my bits. The idea that someone would do this while listening to a podcast or anything else blows my mind.