Size queen.

It seems like an incontrovertible statement to say that if I threw the same number of pitches as Bundy, I’d have only given up 4 runs instead of 7.

After taking all those dongs I’m surprised he can walk...anyone.

I’m pretty sure they make more than $130K.

Could’ve been avoided if he hadn’t slid Soearly.

Would you say, given his past injuries, that a performance like this, I don’t know, brought him up out of the grave?

Yeah, it’s obviously not the same guy. I’m just saying look at him.

That between-the-legs-dribble-alley-oop at 0:45 was sick!

“This woman has a husband. A husband. She didn’t deserve this! HE didn’t deserve this! You’ve ruined her ... for him.”

Fucking THANK YOU. I’m a good person! I do good things! I hate injustice! I don’t need a fucking husband or kids to validate all of my feelings and experiences. Sick of over-privileged women using their platforms to remind the world that I am a lesser being because I have failed to procreate.

shirts.

Bryan Curtis interviewed every writer on the threadbare New Orleans Pelicans beat over at The Ringer. There are three of them and one of them has a full-time job that he plays hooky from while covering the team.

still, having a used jersey that someone wrote all the answers in could really help you through a difficult game.

If the Thunder’s “big three” were the Three Wisemen, Melo is the fucker who showed up with a RadioShack gift card.

“Cooler heads will not prevail.”

“Don’t ever get old. Don’t ever get rich.”