Jack White and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Cubs Game

He's at Wrigley? Even the great Chicago blues guitarists of the past are like, damn, that's some suffering.

Rams New Coach, Tony Dungy: Alright, welcome to training camp with the St. Louis Rams. Here we go with our first set of drills. Michael, we'll start with you. Now, place all of your sins in these and turn your life over to Jesus.

SEC Defensive Player of the Year. The only reason why he was drafted so late is because the NFL is filled with bigots like you. Why is it so hard for people to get that?

I cannot conceive of ever being angry enough at a parent to use the death of a child as a weapon against them.

Actually that would be Jim Mora...

Tony, since you're still a young fella, I hold out hope that you'll eventually mellow out and realize what an ass you're being. This happens to some people when they start thinking that covering all the bases on being a good person might be for the best because of that conversation with St. Peter that's approaching.…

Er, what? Dungy started coaching the Colts in '02.

Alternate Headline: Distraction Distracts Us From Distraction By Being Distractingly Charming

What's with all his specific examples being hitters on the wrong side of 30? Wait, you mean a 33 year old is worse than his 29 year old self? This changes everything!

Okay Tom, it would appear that your suggestion would help left handed hitters more than righties. Lets try some things that will provide assistance to both:

After reading this thought provoking article, I've come to the clear, indisputable conclusion, that if we ban all defenders save the pitcher, Dan Uggla will still not get any hits.

Tony Gwynn is laughing somewhere

This article may have some of the stupider conclusions I've ever read. For example:

What's next, the banning of off speed pitches? Banning of gloves? Fielders can't run and must walk after struck balls?

Ummmm...I don't think the context was confusing. I understood it as exactly what you said (referring to what was done to him and not what he did) and still thought it was horribly racist.

"pseudo-tribal psychological voodoo"

Usually fat and loud. Trying to make up for their unattractiveness with a misguided attempt at being "fun".