Because they’re:

This reminds me of Tories who claim they’re the real feminists because they’ve had two female PMs who were just as cruel, corrupt, and incompetent as the male ones.

Glad Miss Trunchbull found work after Crunchem Hall. Those kids are going to be eating a lot of cake.

It seems like all Trump Thoughts have a point of origin, usually Fox & Friends. Where did this one come from? Was he watching Geostorm when he came up with the idea? Was he thrilled by Gerard Butler punching those space terrorists in their space terrorist faces*? And then he just keep repeating his Trump Thoughts if…

Perhaps there was something on her resume that made many of those NY firms disinclined from hiring her.

If the two sides are not able to come to an agreement, Mueller does have the option of issuing a subpoena, thereby compelling a sitting president to give testimony.

“Here’s the deal: we will give you your interview, but we get the questions in advance and also whatever answers that will keep us all out of prison. Perfectly reasonable terms.”

SNOWFLAKES ARE COMING!

They are never “coming” that is why they are so angry.

Brace yourself, angry white dudes are coming.

I think he blew at least some of that defense when he offered up the baggie of weed. 

She really trying to get that vacant Omarosa spot huh?

Rudy: The real life Barry Zuckercorn.

which leads DJ Trump to parrot the same and admit doing it in a tweet a few minutes following the broadcast

“Stealing large sums of money and filing fraudulent tax returns with the IRS are not crimes.”

Love to do crimes with my good buddy Paul. “Paul the Criminal” we used to call him. Sharp dresser. Fucking loves rugs. Good guy to do crimes with. If I regret anything, it would not be the crimes, but the fact that Paul and I were so bad at editing PDFs.

You know those people are trash and you’re surprised when they act like garbage?

“White Advice for Black People”