If the only reason I know you is because of obnoxious behavior, you should re-think your life choices.

Jay, three cheers on the allowance analogy. I loved it.

I grew up when Patrick Ewing was dominating at Georgetown--where he’s now the head coach. Hello, old...

Data analyst here. Friend with a truck is even worse than a friend who knows computers. We’re both in demand when others are in need.

Shorter Robert E. Lee: “It’s wrong, but it beats paying them a salary.”

Don’t underestimate the desire to not disappoint your parents. My wife chose her first college out of that motivation.

You have the ability to deduct certain expenses from taxes, but realistically, if you’re running a laptop and a monitor, you shouldn’t be paying much extra. And you were going to be paying for the internet, anyway. The wear and tear on your car via commuting is also a factor to be thrown in.

Don’t conflate Lindsey Graham with prostitutes...he does his submissions for free.

Please do, for real. This was an excellent article, and I would love a follow up on that topic.

Swap New Jersey and Florida for D.C. and Puerto Rico, and you don’t even have to change the flag.

I can’t believe no one has posted this one yet...

One of my favorite songs of the decade. The 80s is the decade the formed most of my musical tastes, and that one stands out to this day.

The US has the Marshalls, but they’re more for high-risk federal fugitive apprehensions. 

Roger Goodell is as much a patsy as Donald Trump. Only instead of Mitch McConnell running things, it’s the team owners (mostly Jerry Jones) who use him as their shield. 

So, future FLOTUS, then?

As Hunter S. Thompson said of Richard Nixon, his body should be simply burned in a trash bin.

Well, kinda—the only replies for a while back in November amounted to “Fuck Spanfeller,” sometimes literally that and nothing else

Greg Popovich is the quiet man who only speaks when important things need to be said. 

That’s more wrong than current Deadspin.

I can’t say it at Deadspin anymore, so I’ll say it here.