Step 1) Buy kale

The butter never ceases to be a liquid because most drawn butter is actually "clarified" butter—a food product that removes every last bit of solid matter from butter, leaving only the lipids behind.

In order for drawn butter to become solid again, you'd have to have been sitting at that table for a -very- long time.

htt…

Well Christ, how else are they supposed to prepare for sorority rush?

#YesIDoLikeCoatsBigTime

Man, I miss United States of Tara. :( She was amazing on that show.

Dodai, every time y'all post a picture of her, I immediately look to the shoes. And there they are AGAIN! I imagine her having a storage unit out by JFK, filled with them. And one day, she will open the metal door and there will only be one pair left.

The one with the luggage really pissed me off. Dude's looking at the subway map- he's probably from out of town and visiting. People have a problem with visitors bringing luggage? One must take a cab if they've got luggage? What utter bullshit.

Ya know, I don't agree at all with some of the pictures of men being posted there on the Internet for everyone to see. The really egregious ones should be there, and it's incredibly clear which ones those are, but the ones of the guy with grocery bags? Or the one with old man who fell asleep in a clearly fairly empty…

I hatehatehate people who take pictures of strangers and shame them on the internet. Being moderately rude on the subway is way less rude than taking pictures of people without their consent.

The true heroes are effortless.

No, I suspect most people haven't. They raped and murdered this girl, and they murdered her slowly - her death took weeks.

Actually, they left lots of DNA evidence on her, as well as dozens of bite marks which can be matched to their bite patterns. And she was able to write down their names. And the male friend she was with IDd them. So...pretty much an open and shut case, even without their confessions.

They used the metal rod to disembowel her. I'm thinking I can handle a death sentence here.

Yep, me too. My first thought was "fuck 'em." After I thought about it some more and considered my usual anti-death penalty stance, my next thought was "fuck 'em."

Yeah, go ahead and call for your "brothers", because your hatred for your "sisters" has already been made pretty fucking evident.

I am generally anti-death penalty, but my instinct in this case is

...and we'll look down and whisper, "No."

I like this. It's much more honest than most celebrity cookbooks (side-eyes Gwyneth Paltrow and Ina Garten)

Now, I think, is the time to share my story about when I Slightly Freaked Out Simon Pegg This One Time;