When asked to describe his attacker, McDonald described him as a slight-built man, 5'11", blue eyes, black hair, about 175 lbs. Police have released a sketch:

I did a trauma rotation years ago. I had a man come in with a German Shepherd stuck in him. The dog was sedated. The man was scratched all to hell. He had no idea that the dog "swelled up" during the act and would get stuck. Once that happened the dog went ape shit and it all went downhill from there.

Please don't leave this to the imagination—I request specifics because my imagination is a terrifying entity that exists almost exclusively to disturb and frighten me. And it is doing that now. At least answer one question: was the cat at least declawed?

Now he's got a cap on either end.

Advised : Individual voices in head need their own Jalopnik accounts :)

No, but it might be the beginnings of productivity. QUICK, CLICK ANOTHER LINK, SAVE YOURSELF.

Zardoz and Leeloo had a child?

Side effects of threesomes may include loss of relationships, strained relationships, inability to look friends or significant others in the eye, awkward encounters, dizzyness, kidney stones, slack tongue, nausea, may increase chances of STIs, blurred vision, achey breaky pelvis and chaffing. Do not operate heavy…

Well, considering that the kid was cold, at least the cats tried to do something logical... Because: cats = logic.

I know you're a huge commenter on Deadspin but that's a really shitty thing to post about someone getting murdered. Was that lame joke really THAT important that you just couldn't refrain from posting it?

its defense not art school.

This is a tribute to what a devoted mom can accomplish and is incredibly bad ass.

He, and many others in this thread, have been playing too much GTAV. Unless they really are as stupid as they're claiming, they would also have taken the drugs to the police. It's easy to pretend you would try and make your way as a drug baron, but only the very stupid would try in a situation like this.

TO HELL WITH THAT NOISE

He sounds like every gawker commenter ever.

Yeah, it's the media's fault. Just because he has face tattoos, calls himself Sin Demon and, you know, actually has a criminal history doesn't mean he's a threat.

Ford is really missing an opportunity to pick up some street cred here.

This is pretty fresh, you ever consider taking this material on the road, sinbad?

Heaven forfend you could acknowledge that you made a crappy analogy, and had no business accusing someone of trolling out of the gate, instead of doubling down. It just wouldn't be the Internet. Try not to notice that people who actually live there aren't having a problem with the comment you jumped on.

I'm pretty sure that's a Thutmose IV, bro.