Me too. I never feel safe having full over-ear noise canceling headphones unless I’m on a plane and even then it would only be on a red-eye when I’m trying to get some sleep.

Meh, all I got were some really basic fractals. I’ve had better.

They give death cults a bad name.

Which would be mostly fine if this was just a “drink the koolaid” situation that only affected those sorely lacking in empathy, logic, and reason, but unfortunately this koolaid is quite contagious.

Taken over by the religious puritans who believe their brand of magic makes them eternal. This is was inevitable after they decided Reagan was more of a christian than Carter.

But all that matters is they owned the libs!! Right? Right?

Florida Man is actually a police officer? 

Woods wrote, “in light of the current events when it comes to the sentiment and/or hatred toward law enforcement in our country today, this is being done to ensure there is clear communication and for identification purposes of any individual walking into a lobby.”

Oh Tiffy no.

Right???  Wasn’t there some Chevy Chase movie where he has a fancy event and his extended family crashes it? 

Just a reminder that it’s not normal for an American president to bring not one, but all of his trophy wives’ children and their spouses to a State visit.

Why would someone want to intentionally stream 4k video to a phone-sized screen?

“I like beer.”

I see lots of ‘this person or that person isn’t good enough’, but I don’t see much in the way of endorsing someone that can beat the Republican machine in 2020.  Should we just give up and leave the Democrat seat empty for 2020 and leave Trump in office?

shit. you’re telling me amazon has my address?

Critical safety features sold as extras? Welcome to late stage capitalism, folks! Where the only thing that matters is profits.

Goddamn regulation. If the world is anything like NASCAR then the crashes are the best part. How are we going to get more crashes with all of this big gubment in the way?

/sarcasm
This is really sad. I hope we start taking antitrust legislation seriously again.

It’s okay, I don’t remember your junior year of high school either.

That’s because your Junior year of high school was spent in rehab.

Kelsey Grammer was in rehab at the time and was replaced by Kate Mulgrew, who wasn’t supposed to be in the sketch.