I’ll kill you:

I had two friends from Iowa back in the day who northsplained how you should walk backwards against the wind to avoid freezing your face, spittle and mucus and how your car had to have a plug in heater to warm it up before you even tried to start it. And The Dakotas are north of Iowa, I think. I’ve read many stories…

Some instructors at the gun somewhat safety classes required for the phony tough guy open carry permit advise potential shooters to call 911 immediately and tell the dispatcher that he/she is in fear for his/her life first, and then cap the victim.

I thought Crash was a good movie. But you are right, Good Night and Good Luck should have won. Most Americans, far more than 51%, can’t tell you who Joe McCarthy or Edward R Murrow were though. But that figures. The stupid kids from our elementary school classrooms have taken over. I mean really. Look at the…

Me Too. My Favorite:

appears to be more than a few, thankfully.

You just revealed Harry Chapin’s secret meaning about the Cat and the Cradle the Cat came in. Damn, who woulda known after all these years. Makes me wonder what else that morning DJ on WOLD was up to? No telling what really went on in the back of that taxi either.

I knew about those fast girls when I was in high school. Problem was, I wasn’t fast enough to catch them, but was keeping too swift a pace for the slow ones to catch me. No wonder I didn’t get laid in high school. Somebody should have told me to speed up or slow down.

The father of one of the Vanderbilt rapists used to post pictures of his son and his dates in high school on facebook. He would caption them with shit like Get Some or Who’s Getting Lucky Tonight?

you the kinda guy that gets pissed when a woman slips you a happy face in reply?

what guy chest bumps a chick? Trump and/or a pussy? sorry for the redundancy

he’s such a tough guy, he get’s aggressive with a woman and then fearing he is about to take an ass whupping, hops back in the car and speeds off, yelling.

I’ll fuck you up. I voted for Trump. I gotta right to take pictures. Just cause I’m white don’t mean you can make me stop taking pictures. Trump’s gonna deport your ass, By God! I yell, running away because I voted for Trump but first shooting you if you are unarmed but pose a threat to my pussy Trump voting ass who…

no shit. Hooters is relocating, hopefully

“Y’all are fucking me up” they all yell, like they need help fucking up. The geek in Florida admitted to be mentally ill and unemployed which is not something to be persecuted for until you fuck things up and use both as an excuse. Another feral trumper out west admitted to being off his manic meds when he went off.…

I had to look twice to see the sign. Leaving Hooters. I can see it now, dudes gotta little Coors light buzz. You know 2 or three fuck him up. Instead of being cool and maybe collecting $200-$300 or so to get things fixed eventually, he acts like a redneck Trump voting asshole, yells some racist shit, probably…

Fisher fucking up talking about Belichiks players is like me looking at the Thomas Rhett/Kelsea Ballerini concert ad while listening to my Drive By Truckers Pandora channel. How can enough people be so fucked up that a Thomas Rhett/Kelsea Ballerini concert actually exists outside of an elementary school alleged talent…

Amendola played for Fisher in STL. Fisher could care less if the question was about running backs or not.

I toted over $770 in change that I had been saving for about 10 years into a bank once. I had it in two buckets and each was heavy as hell. I’ll never forget the struggle I made and the looks of the other people. Like, fuck him, the poor motherfucker that has to deposit change.

It’s in Trumputinstan. You’re watching footage from Trump League Hockey. They all voted for Trumputin in Trumputinstan but the votes were recorded in Wisconsin, Michigan, Ohio, and Pennsylvania some how.