I got carded for kombucha. Like seriously... I don’t get carded for wine but surely my one bottle of .5% ABV Ginderade is a problem for this 30 something white lady. Damnit.

It is total false advertising.

I watched Nanette after a straight friend recommended it because, “y’know, you’re queer, and it’s really important!” She didn’t tell me it wasn’t exactly comedy. While I did find it smart, I was mostly annoyed. Literally the last thing I need is a white woman telling me how I should feel about Donald Trump...it’s not…

I love her even though she frightens me. I temped at Conde for six months and lived in terror that we would occupy the same elevator or hallway... and then one day I was in that beautiful old cafeteria and saw her; the ONLY thing on her plate was a pile of roasted potatoes. She just walked down the cafeteria and…

I remember when I was under 18 and couldn’t buy a pocket knife, spray paint, or as you said, WhiteOut at Wal-Mart. But I could go right next door to Lowes and buy that pocket knife, spray paint, and many, many other much more dangerous things: machete, chainsaw, air nailers, all sorts of industrial chemicals, etc. Real…

Hell I don’t even get carded for beer anymore.

Good Lord. I’m Catholic but even I’m tired of hearing about Chris Pratt’s religious life. WE GET IT, you like Jesus.

You are bunch of perverts,  who shares  Panera?? 

Leonardo DiCaprio’s The Wolf of Wall Street bro has nothing on this guy.

70s 80s Ken Doll

Remember how racist Shogun World was before the episode ever aired?

I'm telling you, when this movie comes out about 60% of the Bros in my gym are going to be wearing Aquaman shirts. That says all that needs to be said about this movie. 

I love the Blair Witch Project one. Perfecto.

I teach at a community college, and I can only give them an “F” on the assignment that is plagiarized. At a private university, I set my own policy on it, and I will fail any student who does it, though thankfully all of those students never made me do it.

When I worked as a grader in an art history department at a…

It is so great! (I remember being mildly offended about stupid 50 Shades of Grey taking the name “Mr. Grey” in the context of a supposed BDSM relationship and tarnishing it, lol. James Spader or no one!)

A couple years ago I was having a drink with a friend at Bar Centrale in Manhattan — it’s a tiny piano bar that’s practically in Times Square but because it’s near the theatre district and it’s unmarked and just looks like a residential townhouse from the outside (masking it from tourists), random celebrities often go…

Humbert loved nothing and no one beside himself.

I think the only reason Secretary works (and I love that damn movie so much) is because there really is a power dynamic change — it goes from a totally unhealthy power trip on the part of Spader’s character that he doesn’t know how to manage in a good way, to this great discovery on the part of Gyllenhaal’s character,…