As a Human member of Earth, I solemly swear that I will:

Truthfully, I don't know a lot of super funny people. Most of my friends are delightful, but I have two honest to god hysterical guy friends and one hysterical lady friend. I'm the other hysterical lady (in real life, it translates fairly terribly to internet comments with strangers) so that makes a 50/50 split. I've…

Here's ten dollars, Will Arnette. Go see a Star War.

Of course ladies love Red Wings. AMIRITE FELLAS!?

What the fuuuuuuuuuu...

I mean, if someone was always asking you to embrace the Holy Trinity, what would you think they meant?

I'm not sure if it's unique to the NoVA/DC scene, but I've been here from ages 24-29 (now) and it's been super easy to make and remake friends. It's very transient so you go to a happy hour, meet a friend of a friend and you go "I like baseball*, you like baseball too? Let's go watch baseball!" and then you friend…

I was right in front of the speakers behind the reflecting pool, and this smaller, second video is exactly how it sounded coming out of the speakers. I thought she was singing alongside a track intentionally. Didn't know this would be the next blahblah-gate.

I AM a blonde woman and I sometimes have trouble telling blonde women apart. At least the blonde women who aspire to look like the blonde form I'm sure Aristotle talked about. The one with Juicy on her butt.

This. This this this.

I rarely drink soda, but I discovered Classic Coca Cola is like the best hangover cure, along with greasy eggs. I've since started regulating my booze intake, too. :)

Under the umbrella of the government regulating one's "morals," he does have a point, though that was not the appropriate place to raise the argument (straw man, much?), and she was correct to tell him not to conflate the two. But that makes me curious: do you ladies and gents believe prostitution should be legal? Why…

I'm sorry, I'm really not understanding the point you're trying to make. Can you explain to me what you feel their motives are in doing this? What do they stand to gain? How do trans men fit into your theory?

​I was going to surmise why women would be so defensive and here is the real-life, far better articulation than anything I'd come up with. Personally, based on things like suicide statistics, I'd surmise that transgendered individuals are far more oppressed than cis women over the course of their lifetime, even if you…

When Girl Scouts sell outside of a grocery store, they keep a large amount of stock on hand to sell on the spot...like hundreds of boxes. Usually in one of the moms' mini vans.

Old guys, anecdotally, just know how to do it correctly, because they seem genuinely engaged and interested in you as a human. I enjoy chatting them up on the street, they're invariably polite and sweet to me.