I’m still skeptical of this whole Kate and Meghan issue. I feel like its just the media making a big to-do about nothing. I think they are all laughing in their castle at all this horse-shit the media comes up with.

I went to my tenth and felt instantly transported back into my fat girl with glasses persona. It seemed the cliques just re-formed, as if the last ten years hadn’t happened at all. I think I stayed long enough to eat dinner since I’d paid for it and hightailed it out of there.

I once saw Julie Walters do a fart gag on a show called dinnerladies and I still sometimes remember it and laugh. Not proud, but not ashamed either.

I always think that they mean “dickhead”.

BUT YOU CAN ASK IT TO TELL YOU THE NEXT STEP IN YOUR RECIPE WHILE YOU’RE COOKING

OH MY GOD!

I always brag about how we aren’t travelling or dealing with shitty family. I go all “oh it’s so amazing and intimate, only doing what we want with who we want! No shitty relatives and judgement! We have the best Christmas, it’s amazing!”

one year, my brother gave everyone framed photos of himself & his new wife with the pope!

This gift wasn’t given to me personally but it was still pretty awful from my perspective:

I get the impression Sarah Summers spent a lot of high school gym class throwing tampons in the shower at bullied girls. I also get the impression that her mother told the school administration officials that everyone is just jealous of her daughter, which is the REAL problem!

After considering a lawsuit, Ms. Dushku entered into mediation with CBS. Mark Engstrom, the chief compliance officer at CBS, participated, along with Bettina B. Plevan, a partner at the law firm Proskauer Rose, who was serving as outside counsel for the company.

I’m amazed the Queen let her take the wheel.

Ah, the time-tested 14 Day Trial By Orgasm. The old ways are the best ways.

I would murder him.

I just call them assholes.  Seems to fit just as well

May I submit for consideration, “Pestilencians”?

The preferred nomenclature isn’t “anti-vax”, it’s “pro-disease”!

Do you think Selena Gomez is starting to feel like Good Luck Chuck?

The Wknd (or whatever) looks like Dave Lister from Red Dwarf, and I can’t take anything he does seriously because of that.